USC Football

My husband was a HUGE University of Southern California football fan. I was never sure why because that's not where he went to college. But even after we moved to Colorado, he continued to follow them as much as he could. After he died, I didn't watch very much football and kind of lost track of what was happening in that world. If it weren't for Dan Luebcke's enthusiasm for the Denver Broncos (and that's putting it mildly), I probably wouldn't have known what was going on with them either. Today when I opened my MSN homepage, I saw a link to an article about USC. I decided I had to read the article. To my great joy, I discovered that not only did they beat Notre Dame yesterday, they are chasing history -- going for an unprecedented three consecutive national titles. Alan would be thrilled! He loved football, and he loved USC football. Way to go, Trojans!

October Update

I'm going to post my monthly updates here on my blog for those who would like to access it this way. It is also available in PDF format on my website.

My Car -
I thought I would show you a picture of my car. Isn’t it cute? I love driving it.

EET (Our Online School)
There is still much work to be done to get the school running at "full speed" but the first course should begin very soon. At last count, we had between 10-15 students interested in taking the course. Jon is working 12-18 hour days to get things ready. I am helping a little, but studying language and traffic rules takes most of my time.

(There was a paragraph about my blog included in this letter, but since you're here, you don't really need to read about it.)

This month’s quote:
Love, too, has a way of burning away what we once thought we could count on...He is not only the burning bush of the law; he is also the flame of life that burns away all that keeps us from being loved by him intimately. Obedience is an ongoing invitation to relinquish control...I’m sure you would agree: the greatest miracle is that any of our hearts would call God good in the midst of letting go. It’s hard...over time we realize we’re leaving behind things that were not big enough for our heart’s passion anyway, but as it is happening, it hurts like crazy.
Jan Meyers, Listening to Love; Responding to the Startling Voice of God

Praises:
1. Funds are coming in for my car. Continue to pray.
2. I am making progress in learning the "rules of the road" in Spain. My scores get a little better each time I take a test.
3. Nacho’s dad is now working and living in Cuéllar.
4. I have some new ideas for meeting with people at church to practice the language. I will also begin meeting with my two language helpers next week.

Prayer Requests:
1. Pray that we will find just the right driving school, one that will be willing to work with a student who doesn’t speak fluent Spanish.
2. Pray for Jon to have supernatural strength as he puts in long hours to get the online school up and running.
3. Pray for wisdom as to the best time to return to language school and how to schedule the remaining weeks I have left.
4. I have lost $200 in monthly support this year. Pray for God to supply what is needed.

Widows' Words

What do you say when you really don’t know what to say? Sometimes it’s better to say nothing at all. Your presence, your love and a hug are sometimes more than enough.

I received this book recently from my friend, Anne (who also happens to be the author). Following her husband’s death, she was often frustrated by the things people said and much of what she read in “grief” books. As a result, she asked several widows (myself included) to participate with her in sharing our experiences with others. As Anne says in her introduction, “In those first few weeks of barely being able to breathe, of grief that overwhelmed me, of new fears and uncertainty, I found a ray of hope in the words of other widows…I wanted to share my experience with other widows, to help them gain that sense of ‘you are not alone’ in those first few awful months or whenever they need encouragement. That is how Widows’ Words was born…I have taken ten statements that people often make to a widow and gathered different widows’ words and thoughts on each topic.”

Each chapter includes insights and experiences from Anne’s life, as well as from several other widows. She has included photographs and scripture throughout the book that also minister to the soul. This would have been a wonderful book to have had right after Alan died, but even now it comforts my heart in those lonely days that still come. If you are a recent widow, or know someone who is, or would even like to be prepared to comfort someone you know when the time comes (and it will come), I would highly recommend this book. To find more information, read excerpts or place an order, go to http://www.trafford.com/05-1102.

Listening to Love

I am in the middle of another great book. In the first chapter, Jan Meyers says, "Love has a way of getting our attention. Actually, Love has a way of messing up our lives. We all know it to be true. If we desire a carefully ordered life, tranquil and serene, then when the Voice of Love calls, we had better run inside and bolt the door. Tight. We can never prepare for this most honored of all guests, who quietly enters and then asks us to follow. We wonder whether we know the Voice of Love, so we strain to discern it amid the cacophony around and in us. Then we begin to recognize it, and we're not sure we welcome it. It doesn't take us long to remember tender times we labored to hear God and followed as best we could, only to end up befuddled and confused for a while. Maybe this still, small, disruptive guest is after something more than making the path clear to us."

Throughout the book, she explores what she calls the three postures of the heart, the movements the heart goes through to follow the Voice of Love with confident expectation. The first posture of the heart is the invitation to respond and asks the question, "Is it really you, Jesus?" The second posture of the heart is facing what we fear, and we often respond with, "Oh no, it really is you, Jesus." The third posture of the heart is where we learn to admit what we really want and we respond with, "Oh good, it is you, Jesus." Using examples from her own life (losing her good friend and colleague, Brent Curtis, unmet expectations of marriage and her brother's battle with cancer) and stories of others' struggles as well, she talks about relinquishing our "control," our pride, our autonomy, our religion, and listening to sorrow, our need, each other, reality and our exhaustion as we strive to hear the Voice of Love.

She challenges us to "embrace a love that's worth the risk. While God does ask everything of us, he actually wants everything for us. He doesn't want blind loyalty or bored religious compliance; he longs for nothing less than our entire passionate selves--something most of us have yet to glimpse. God's desire is that we lean in, listen, and wrestle with him so that we can respond to him without fear. Can this God be trusted? Absolutely. Will the journey be easy? Not a chance. But once you learn to listen to love, you'll find that there's only one way you can adore this unmanageable, unpredicatable, wild, and unruly God: with your whole heart."

What have you been doing lately?

It's been 10 days since I last made an entry here. It's been a busy time, full of a variety of activities. I finally got my car- a Honda Jazz! Here is a photo from the web. Mine is a little darker grey. It's been fun to be able to offer to drive once in a while so Kathy doesn't always have to. We even made a trip to Madrid last week to pick up material for the students who are registered for our online school.

The Women's Bible Study at church has started again. They have asked me to help lead, but I told them I really think I need to have a better handle on the language before I try anything that bold. We'll see if I'm ready after the first of the year.

Our WorldVenture Spain team had our first annual fall picnic in Madrid last Saturday. It was fun to be together and catch up on the latest in each other's lives. We hadn't been together since our spring retreat.

Our pastoral team at church had a family dinner last night at Jon and Kathy's. The men meet together bi-monthly and I have started attending those meetings to take notes, when I can understand what they're talking about. :-) But we have wanted the wives and children to be together also, so we're starting to have monthly dinners. It was a good time.

Nacho has started playing soccer (futbol) on a team near Valladolid. He invited me to his game today, so Jon, Kathy, Emilio (Nacho's dad) and I were all in attendance. They lost, but it's only a pre-season game, and many of the kids are new to the team, so we're hoping they will begin to gel as a team and play better as time goes on.

In addition to these fun activities, I continue to study for my driver's test and practice my Spanish when I have the opportunity, although I have to force myself to do it. I'm still in the "I don't want to say anything if I can't say it well" mindset and Kathy continues to gently nudge me out of my comfort zone. I will begin meeting with my language helpers again this week and am looking for more opportunities to meet with people from church to begin to get to know them and also practice my Spanish.

I'm continuing to read, but that's a topic for another blog. That should catch you up with me. Drop me a note and let me know what you're up to.

Love, Pat